When I got married, I was so young, totally in love, but super young nonetheless (hey, when you know you know 🙂 ). It was also right before I started my business, so those two facts combined meant that I didn’t know much about being married or planning a wedding, but as with most things in life, I figured why the heck CAN’T I plan this myself? I can do anything right? So I did (with the help of our mom’s, family, and friends of course). And while my wedding turned out amazing and I’ve gotten to spend every day with my best friend ever since, one thing I would’ve loved to have been told was to ease up on the tradition just a hair. I was so worried about making sure that my wedding was planned the right way, that it never crossed our minds to include some things that were our own traditions.
In such a disposable world we’re living in right now, it’s so important to have the things that matter not be disposable. Because I grew up in a family of really passionate lovers of history and ancestry, I love family heirlooms and traditions so much, but I also believe it’s really important to intertwine those deep family traditions with some new ones of your own.
Don’t be afraid to go against the grain of tradition and do a first look if it suits you better. Maybe wearing a blush pink or dusty blue dress, rather than a pure white, is something you really want to do, but you know tradition says brides wear white. Perhaps foregoing a veil, or your groom wants to wear a navy or deep marsala for a suit color rather than traditional black, are things you can’t stop thinking about. You might want to write your own vows, so that you can really tell each other exactly what you’re heart is saying, and the thought of having your officiant marrying you with the same words as he does everyone else is impersonal. You could want to spend some alone time together, away from the crowd, just to have a quiet moment with your new forever love. Your little family might have grown by one cute labradoodle and you want him to be your ring bearer instead of a person. Whatever it is that pulls at your heart and tells you “This! This will make our day even more special. I can’t wait to tell our children how we did this amazing thing on our wedding day, because they’ll want to do it too!”, I encourage you to embrace it, and do it.
After the wedding is done and over, and LIFE is back to normal, starting your own family traditions is so amazing as well. Get a new ornament for your Christmas tree every year that symbolizes a major milestone from that year, have coffee together every morning, take a trip every year to somewhere you’ve never been, make handmade Valentine’s gifts every year…bring your family’s traditions into your marriage but create your own in the process because building a marriage is amazing, and creating traditions together will bring you so much closer together in the process!